Herbal Medicine for Preppers: Artichokes and Easter

[00:00:00] Hey y'all welcome to this week's show. Hey it's Good Friday when I'm recording this. Hopefully you'll hear this next couple of days. I just want to go ahead and wish you all a very happy Easter. This is the most important day of the year. For some reason I guess in America, and that's probably because of our roots in England, we don't celebrate Easter as much as we do Christmas.

[00:00:26] And that's a real shame because Easter really is the most important date of the Christian calendar. And I guess if you're of a different religion this may not mean a lot to you, but we are Easter people. Easter Sunday is the reason we go to church on Sunday by the way. I know a lot of people say no you got to stick to the Jewish Sabbath. No, no. Jesus died on the Jewish Sabbath. He lay in the grave. The law died with him.

[00:00:54] The new man, the new religion of Christianity arose on Sunday and we are Easter people. And if you have any doubt about that, go back to the earliest writings of Christian authors in like, oh maybe, would it be maybe Irenaeus about 120 AD. The Didache, which was written when at least one of the apostles was still alive, specifically says that Christians gather for church and worship on Sunday.

[00:01:24] Having rejected the Jewish Sabbath as no longer being part of their religion. So I know that may be controversial to some, but the Christian day of worship is Sunday, the day Jesus rose from the dead. The day of Pentecost when the Holy Spirit descended on the apostles and that is the birth of the church. You are not a Christian if you worship on the Jewish Sabbath. You're not Jewish either, unless you are Jewish.

[00:01:54] But I'm not sure what you are. But all this, you know, Torah observant seven-day Adventist stuff is not Christianity. And, you know, I'm sorry if that offends you, but we are Easter people. And if you have any doubt, go back and read the writings of the first 300 years or so of the first Christians. Because they documented it really well. A lot of times they were writing like to the pagan emperor of Rome,

[00:02:23] who was trying to exterminate all Christians in around 200, 250 AD. I mean, there were so many, Nero and all them that, you know, killed so many Christians. Christians and they would state, this is what Christians believe. This is how and when we worship and what we do. No one really disputed that Christians worshipped on Sunday, really until about 50 years ago, when a bunch of very ignorant people kind of made up a new religion

[00:02:52] and started telling people that anybody that goes to church on Sunday is going to hell. And, okay, I'm sorry, that's false. That's heresy. And you need to get that straight. So, I'm just going to lay that out there. I know it's going to piss off a lot of people. But Christians go to church on Sunday. Go to church on the day your grandparents went to church. Depending on how old you are, okay? I mean, like I said, this whole seven-day Adventist thing didn't get going until about the 1920s, I believe.

[00:03:19] The two people who founded it were convicted con artists and people who had ran scams of, like, fake cures for cancer, magic beans. And, like, one of them actually did this big thing of raising money to buy a limousine in, I guess it was about the 30s, saying that Elijah and Moses were going to come back and he needed to have a limousine to drive them around in.

[00:03:48] Okay, this is really crazy stuff. And not to mention they predicted the end of the world several times and had people sell all their possessions and give them the money. You know. Again, I know it's going to be offensive, but Christians go to church on Sunday. We celebrate Easter when Jesus rose from the dead. If you're Jewish, you don't. You know, I get that. If you're Muslim, you don't. I get that.

[00:04:12] But if you call yourself Christian, maybe you want to spend a little time learning what Christians actually do think and believe and have for 2,000 years. Rather than listening to some preacher who's basically making it up as he goes, basing everything he says on something that hasn't been around for more than 50 years. Maybe 70. Okay, let's say it's been around for 100 years. You know what? The Christianity has been around for over 2,000 years.

[00:04:40] And we've got literally thousands of books. And right now it's so great. They're all available online. You can just Google early church fathers and you will find all the writings of all the first Christians. Pope St. Clement of Rome, the third pope who was actually ordained by St. Peter, who talks about the Catholic Church specifically in about, gosh, 130 A.D.

[00:05:10] Like I said, St. Irenaeus, origin. I could go really St. Justin martyr. I believe he was actually ordained by St. John, the last of the living apostles. There were actually letters back and forth between them. I think it was actually Justin and St. John and the Blessed Virgin Mary. They wrote each other letters.

[00:05:39] And you could actually go read. And there's no doubt Easter is the holiest day of the year. And this is a really special Easter because it's the same on the Orthodox calendar. So literally all Christians in the world are celebrating Easter on the same day this year. Doesn't often happen because we run on two different calendars.

[00:06:00] And so how about if we all of all denominations get together and celebrate the resurrection of Jesus in two days? I mean, is that a crazy idea? I think, you know, that's why it was says in the Bible, gather together on the Lord's day. They were gathered together on the Lord's day. They were preaching on the Lord's day. The Lord's day is not the Jewish Sabbath. It's the day the Lord rose from the dead.

[00:06:27] And Jesus said, the Son of Man is Lord of the Sabbath. The Sabbath was made for man and man not made for the Sabbath. When you go throughout the New Testament, every time they asked Jesus, you know, what are the main commandments? He would say, don't steal. Don't commit adultery. Honor thy father and thy mother. Love God with all your heart. Love your neighbor as yourself. He never mentioned the Jewish Sabbath. He continually, in every instance of the Gospels, violated the laws of the Jewish Sabbath.

[00:06:57] And rose again on the third day as a sign. And if you have any questions, just read the Acts where they say we're not bound by the Mosaic law anymore. We're not bound at all by that law anymore. And, you know, go get a copy of the D.K. That means the writings of the 12. That was the 12 apostles who said, this is what Christians believe. This is how, when we worship, etc. It was published, get this, more than 200 years before the Bible.

[00:07:24] The Bible was not translated from its various languages. You know, it was written in Hebrew. It was written in Aramaic. It was written in Greek. It was translated into Latin, which was the universal language of the time, in the late 300s by St. Jerome. It was then, the books were authorized. The church got together and had a big meeting and said, this is a book that's valid and these are books that aren't valid. A lot of them didn't make the cut.

[00:07:52] For over 300 years, almost 400 years, Christianity did not have a Bible. It had the Old Testament, some of which the books they accepted and some they didn't. And it had, you know, a church like you'd have the Epistle of St. Paul to the Corinthians. Well, they had his letter in Corinth. They didn't have his letter in Tarsus.

[00:08:13] You know, the Bible had to be translated into a common language and then approved by the church at the time. That's how you got the Bible. For almost twice as long as America has been a nation, Christians had no Bible. Well, Jesus didn't leave us a Bible. He left us a church that gave us the Bible. And the church says worship on Sunday.

[00:08:40] And I hope to see you all in church on Sunday if you're a Christian. And if you're not, I hope you'll seriously consider why, you know, millions and millions of us will be gathering to worship on Sunday. So now let me get off my soapbox. You're not here to hear me talk about religion. If you are interested in hearing me talk about religion, you know, I have a whole separate podcast. It's called The Uncensored Catholic.

[00:09:06] And I mainly deal with topics such as this, Christian apologetics, explaining the faith, and a lot of history. Really a lot of history. And if you want to know why, look up a man named John Henry Cardinal Newman and look for his quotes. And, you know, there is no benefit in being an ignorant Christian. You can't defend your faith. An ignorant Christian is going to lose his faith.

[00:09:36] And, yeah, anyway, I know a lot of you aren't going to agree with me on this, but go to church on Sunday. Worship Jesus as he intended in his church and enjoy Easter. And it's just a great time, especially if you have a family. It's a great time if you have kids. Let them eat some chocolate. Give them some Easter eggs. You know, Jesus held up the child as an example of the perfect Christian. And it's a time of new birth. It's a time of regeneration.

[00:10:05] And, I mean, that's recognized by other religions other than Christianity. That's why the egg is actually a symbol of Easter. It's, you know, the rebirth symbol, regeneration. And it's a beautiful, wonderful, wonderful day. And, you know, I hope everybody gets to enjoy it. I really do. Now, let's get on to the herb of the week. And it's one of my favorites.

[00:10:31] And, actually, this one really actually has some religious significance as well. Long used in the Jewish tradition. It's the artichoke. I love artichokes. Now, I know not everybody loves artichokes. They say you either love them or hate them. It's a slightly bitter vegetable. It's certainly not as popular in America as it is in Europe. But it should be. It's absolutely delicious. It's really one of my favorite foods. It's also a medicinal herb.

[00:11:00] And it's in season right now. So, what's better than that? I mean, I love artichokes. And my favorite preparation is really just take the globe artichoke. It's actually an improved cardoon, actually. The cardoon is the wild variety of the artichoke. And if you can't grow artichokes where you live, if it's not hot enough, you may be able to grow cardoons, which are pretty much almost the same except smaller. So, that's, you know, good to know. I usually would just trim them.

[00:11:29] You want to take off all the spiky bits and then steam them. Put a little olive oil and butter on there. And it's just fantastic. I mean, just really fantastic. Put a little white wine in and salt in the water that you steam them in. They will oxidize quickly. That's why you put lemon juice on them. Just like you would do with avocados if you're making guacamole. You know. Pull off the stems. Dip them in butter. And pull them between your teeth. You'll get all the flesh off the... It's actually a petal. Well, is it calyx? I'm not sure.

[00:11:59] But anyway, it's almost like a leaf. Pull it off with your teeth. And just discard the hard kind of woody bits. The hearts are fantastic. Eating the same way. Or pickled or chopped into sauces. I love them with crawfish tails. Olive oil, garlic, and pasta. This is like really one of my favorite things. You can stuff artichokes. Absolutely phenomenal deep fried. That's the traditional way of eating them in Italy.

[00:12:27] And that goes back to a Jewish tradition we'll get into a little bit later. I doubt really there's any bad way to eat an artichoke. Except don't eat the choke itself. This is a thistle. And it's got a prickly spiny in the center. You've got to pull out the choke. And the rest of it? Absolutely fantastic. Be sure to save about three good inches of stem below the artichoke. Peel it and eat it. Fantastic. Really, really good. Now, medicinally though, artichokes should never be overlooked.

[00:12:56] I mean, in modern use, Plants for Future says the globe artichoke has been important as medicinal herb. And especially in recent years, following the discovery of Cynarin, this bitter tasting compound, which is found in the leaves, improves liver and gallbladder function, stimulates secretion of digestive juices, especially bile, and lowers blood cholesterol levels. The leaves are anticholesterolemic means it helps reduce cholesterol.

[00:13:25] Antirheumatic means it helps reduce swollen joints, essentially. Well, it could also help with rheumatoid, other rheumatic conditions. But anyway. Colagogue and digestive means it helps with gas, helps sell the stomach, helps you digest your food. Diuretic removes excess fluids. Hypoglycemic means it lowers blood sugar. And lithoantripic, which means it can help prevent or get rid of kidney and bladder stones.

[00:13:53] They are used internally in the treatment of chronic liver and gallbladder diseases, jaundice, hepatitis, arterial sclerosis, and early stages of late onset diabetes. That's type 2. The leaves are best harvested before the plant flowers and can be used fresh or dried. The flowers, which is actually the artichoke, can be eaten and you get the medicinal benefit from that as well. So you can harvest the leaves, dry them, and use them in teas and tinctures and such. Or you can also just eat it.

[00:14:22] People have been cultivating artichokes probably at least since ancient Egypt, maybe Samaria or Babylon. Now, as I said, it's descended of the wild cardoon, that's Sinara cardinunculus, which is native to the Mediterranean areas. And there was a debate over whether artichoke was food or medicine among the ancient Greeks and Romans.

[00:14:50] And basically, they decided on food because it's just absolutely delicious. But the cardoons mentioned as a garden plant in the 8th century by Homer and Hesiod. Pliny, the elder, mentioned growing of carduus in Carthage and Cordoba. In North Africa, it's still found in the wild states, so it probably originated out of North Africa.

[00:15:16] The seeds of artichokes from the cultivated varieties have been found during excavations of the Roman period, ancient Rome. In Egypt, varieties of artichoke have been found going back as far as they know. I mean, really. Sicily, they were cultivated in Sicily in the classical period of the ancient Greeks.

[00:15:39] Greeks, Greeks cultivated probably, Greeks probably improved on the cardoon and turned it into the modern artichoke that we know. Further improvement took place in Spain around the, by the 12th century. It was mentioned as growing in Seville along with the citrus and such.

[00:16:01] Of course, I mean, it was just well known throughout Europe, at least by 10, 100 A.D., so well over 1,000 years ago. Diaschorides described artichoke, called it by whatever Greek name, I think, Scolimus or something. He said the root lies underneath. He liked the root for medicine, and that's kind of different.

[00:16:28] We don't really think of the root of artichoke that much anymore, but he said it was specifically good for those who had a bad smell in the armpits. So apparently it had some sort of maybe lymphatic, lymph-cleaning system. It would help, they would call it a blood purifier at the same time. But he said it draws out much stinking urine. So I guess it's a diuretic property. It was carrying those toxins out through the urine.

[00:16:54] He said the new growth of the herb, boiled like asparagus, is eaten as a vegetable. And it is and is absolutely delicious. Really, the stalks, especially the cardoon, more asparagus-like. Artichoke and asparagus, kind of similar to me. I'd say the artichoke is a little more buttery. I think that's the way I would describe it. But looking at the, Miss Grieve, writing in the 1930s, said it's one of the world's oldest cultivated vegetables,

[00:17:23] grown by the Greeks and Romans in the heyday of their power. It was introduced to England in the 16th century, both as a vegetable and an ornamental plant in monastery gardens. And if you look at old sculptures and paintings from England in the Middle Ages, you will often see artichokes being grown ornamentally. They were real big on that. Not sure why. They like ferns. They like artichokes. Eventually, the pineapple kind of became a very popular symbol in English art.

[00:17:54] Anyway, Parkinson's 1640 alludes to the statement of Theophrastus from the 4th century B.C. That's 4th century B.C. So that's 2,600 years ago. That the head of the scolomus or artichoke is most pleasant being boiled or eaten raw, but chiefly when it is in flour, as also the inner substance of the head is eaten. That's the artichoke heart. And it was used as a receptacle to be stuffed.

[00:18:23] And it contained nutritive matter and a delicate flavor, which means it was nutritious and it is a nice, delicate flavor. I love artichoke butter. Oh, man, you take those artichoke hearts and you mash them up. You mix them with butter, make a compound butter out of that. Spread it on a steak. Oh, man, that's good. Or on corn. A good, yes, sweet corn and steak on the grill with artichoke butter. You cannot beat that. Maybe if you could add some crawfish tail or some shrimp. Yeah, that's good stuff.

[00:18:54] So, Torniforte, writing in 1730, said the artichoke is well known to the table. Let's see, the choke, Florette, okay, he just talks about how it was really popular in France and Germany. He said that the French and Germans would boil them, as we do, but the Italians generally eat them raw with salt, oil, and pepper. I guess that's going to be more the artichoke heart. They were probably blanched first, maybe even preserved in oil, but he described it as almost a pickle.

[00:19:24] He said raw, but with salt, oil, and pepper, they would have at least been marinated. And we do eat, we marinate artichoke hearts. That's probably exactly what he's talking about. So, Gerard, writing, I guess Gerard would be about the 1500s, he thought artichokes to be an aphrodisiac, which is rather odd, but he also liked, he cited Dioscorides and said it made a very good deodorant. So, that was centuries before Edward Bernays,

[00:19:54] the father of propaganda in the United States, the nephew of Sigmund Freud, coined the term B.O. and made everybody fear they had body odor. Well, you know, even back in the 1500s, people were trying to not stink. You know, always a good thing to aspire toward, not to stink. He also said that it was good, let's see, we'll skip a bit,

[00:20:23] get more into the medicinal uses. He said, it stayeth the involuntary course of the natural seed in either man or woman. Basically saying it would help prevent premature ejaculation in a man. In a woman, I'm thinking he was saying it would stop excessive menstrual bleeding. Don't know if that's true. Either way, kind of an odd use for artichoke, especially considering that he considered to be an aphrodisiac as well.

[00:20:52] Also, I have no idea. He was an odd dude. But he said that some write, if the buds of young artichokes be first steeped in wine and eaten, they provoke urine and stir up the lust of the body. So this is small florets, I guess, of artichokes steeped in wine. I've never tried it that way. I doubt I'd even notice being a single guy. So, living deep in the woods. Anyway, he says, I find moreover that the root is good against the rank smell of the armholes.

[00:21:22] So there you go. So he said, the root was boiled in wine and drunk. And it sendeth forth plenty of stinking urine, whereby the rank and ramish savor of the body is much amended. So if you smell rank and ramish, you might want to have artichoke root in wine. If you've ever been around a billy goat, you kind of know what he's talking about. And yes, we had goats on the farm growing up. I'm a huge fan of goats, actually.

[00:21:51] They will drive you insane. But they're also really fun. They're like dogs with hooves. Really dumb dogs with hooves that can figure out how to climb on and get out of just about anything and will butt you when you're not looking. So if you like unpredictable farmyard animals, goats are certainly the way to go. I take goats over geese. And I actually really like geese, but geese will bite you. Geese are really mean. Goats are just more annoying.

[00:22:21] So Culpepper wrote of artichokes, they provoke the lust, as indeed they do, being somewhat windy meat. So apparently he thought they were aphrodisiac and gave you gas, which is probably a bad combination. He said, And here I care not greatly if I quote a little of Galen's nonsense in his treaty of the faculties of nourishment. He saith they complain plenty of choleric juice, notwithstanding, I can scarcely believe,

[00:22:50] of which he saith it is engendered of melancholy, this juice, and the melancholy juice thinned the cleric blood. So Galen was actually probably one of our first somewhat modern physicians. Actually, he was really into forensic medicine, a lot of autopsies, a lot of really gruesome experiments he did. You know, in the Roman Empire, before the time of Christianity, they could use prisoners in medical experiments quite a bit.

[00:23:20] And he was real big on skinning people alive and taking out their organs and seeing how they worked. But his research really is the foundation of a lot of medical knowledge these days, surgery especially. And yeah, so Culpepper didn't think much of him. I can't, I think he was probably a sadistic, horrible, like a Nazi, you know.

[00:23:49] What are you going to do? You know, following World War II, a lot of those Nazi doctors that did all those horrible experiments on children and such that, you know, are just unspeakable and were a big part of the Nuremberg trials and all that, they didn't go to jail. They actually went to work for the U.S. government. A lot of people don't know that, but it's true. And a lot of our modern medical, I don't know how you'd even put it,

[00:24:17] industry, philosophy, complex, whatever you want to call it, does owe to such sadistic monsters, actually. And, you know, another reason I don't like going to doctors, if I can help it. John Kehoe in the Irish tradition, and believe it or not, yes, you could actually grow artichokes in Ireland, but probably the Cardoon would do better there. They had greenhouses and such. So, he said artichokes are cleansers and are also good for jaundice,

[00:24:45] and the leaves, when stamped and applied to the skin, draw out thorns and splinters. So the leaves have an astringent property. A teammate of the leaves that grow on the stalk cures the ague, that's fevers, and yeah, it actually does. It has a, much like gentian and other bitter herbs, can help with fevers. And when drank about an hour before the fit approaches, taken three or four times, would cure the ague. I guess I should say that's fever, usually a malarial fever. In our area, in our era, I should say,

[00:25:15] artichokes are just generally regarded as food, but they're a delicious food. And, you know, all medicine doesn't taste bad. And these are great. I enjoy them a lot. And I said I would mention an old recipe. At the end, what they call the, I guess, the Jewish ghettos of Rome. They have a tradition of deep-frying artichokes. And this was, I think, if I remember correctly,

[00:25:43] especially popular about this time of year around Passover, where they enjoy the bitter herbs and all that. And they're just simply artichokes deep-fried in olive oil until they're crispy and salted. And they're absolutely delicious. Give that a try if you haven't. I don't have a recipe right in front of me, but it's actually that simple. You're just talking a trimmed, cleaned artichoke, deep-fried in olive oil and salted. Couldn't be easier.

[00:26:11] And really just delicious. I don't think there's a bad way to eat an artichoke. And get them going in your garden. They're somewhat perennial. I can't remember if they're biannual or not. But anyway, once you get them going, they should self-seed and keep going. You're going to want to find, they don't like wet feet, you're going to want to find a dry area, good sunlight. If you don't have that, if you're a cooler climate like I am, look into the cardoon.

[00:26:41] That may be an option. Or you may be able to do a greenhouse or whatever. Or even just grow them in pots and try to care for them that way. Because they are a hot-weather, dry Mediterranean plant. But they're really delicious. And they're sort of an Easter herb. They're very traditional in Easter meals because they're coming in about this time. Like with asparagus and a lot of... I mean, it depends where you live. I mean, if you're in a cooler climate, they're going to come in later.

[00:27:10] But in the area where they're from, they're coming in about now. So really nice. I mean, of course, not being Jewish, I'm going to have my wonderful Easter ham. And some artichoke would go really well with that. Maybe a hollandaise sauce, some good asparagus. Oh, yeah. You know, that's good stuff. And this being Good Friday, I'm not eating anything like that today. Our tradition is to fast on Good Friday.

[00:27:39] So just thinking about food has my mouth watering. Absolutely. And what's a tradition shared by both Catholics and Protestants and Orthodox alike for Easter? It's the eggs. And again, that goes back to pre-Christian times. That goes back probably to ancient Babylon. And it's just a symbol of rebirth, of new life. In the South, we love our deviled eggs. I mean, yeah, it's great if you want to boil eggs and paint them up and have your Easter eggs. Kids love that. Great.

[00:28:09] We have deviled eggs. We take that yellow, the yolk out of that boiled egg, you know, slice it in half, mix in some mayonnaise and salt and pepper. And you can do whatever you want. You know, you can add herbs to it. You definitely, chives are always nice. A little paprika across the top. I'm going to be shoveling those things in my mouth with baked ham and some good, probably mustard greens. They're like nobody's business come Easter. And I gave up cigars and bourbon for Lent.

[00:28:38] So I really, I gave up cigars and bourbon for Lent. Let me just repeat that. If you know me, that's like, you know, that's a big deal. So I'm going to have, I'm planning on having a very nice Easter Sunday. That's my version of the kids with all the candy. I'm going to have ham and deviled eggs and greens and spring vegetables and probably a nice glass of bourbon and a good cigar or two.

[00:29:05] And I'm really looking forward to it. But remember the reason for the season. We don't give up things for Lent just to, you know, like when you're a kid, they say, you know, don't eat candy or cookies during Lent. You know, that's, that's a hardship. What it does, it makes you mindful of what we're, the importance of this holiday, what we're leading up to. The Lent is, you know, symbolic of Christ's 40 day fast in the desert. It's very important.

[00:29:32] As adults, we need to give up things that are a lot more important than candy. So food is just like a reminder. You know, we need to be working on our virtues and giving up our vices and spending more time in prayer and doing more, you know, nice things for people in our family, taking care of our relatives, our elders. If you have children, you know, giving to charity, giving alms. The Bible says alms covers a multitude of sins.

[00:30:00] Believe it or not, works are important. Faith alone is not going to get you to heaven. Sorry, it's not. Martin Luther admitted that he changed the words of the Bible to say that because he did not like charity and didn't want to give to charity and he actually said that it was a bad thing to be charitable. He was, he said some really odd things. He actually accused Jesus of adultery. You know, I can see you that quote if you want. He was, he said some really weird stuff.

[00:30:29] Anyway, that's what Lent's all about. It's, you know, giving of alms. It's doing penance. It's praying more. It's, you know, it's not all about the food. But as Christians, we fast and we feast. And Easter's the biggest feast day of the year. And I fully intend to avoid gluttony, but to enjoy what God's given us in these great blessings to the fullest extent that I can. May even have some oysters. Yes.

[00:30:58] Ham and oysters is a wonderful combination. Maybe do a nice mustard sauce. Mmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's going to be nice. That's going to, and a hollandaise. I can definitely see that some, maybe some artichokes will work their way in there. I can see this coming together. It's going to be a good day. And of course, just thank God for, for all these blessings and, and for every breath we take. It's a wonderful,

[00:31:28] wonderful time. Wonderful time. All right, y'all. Have a great week and I will talk to you next time. The information in this podcast is not intended to diagnose or treat any disease or condition. Nothing I say or write has been evaluated or approved by the FDA. I'm not a doctor. The U.S. government does not recognize the practice of herbal medicine and there is no governing body regulating herbalists. Therefore, I'm really just a guy who studies herbs.

[00:31:57] I'm not offering any advice. I won't even claim that anything I write or say is accurate or true. I can tell you what herbs have been traditionally used for. I can tell you my own experience and if I believe an herb has helped me. I cannot nor would I tell you to do the same. If you use an herb anyone recommends, you are treating yourself. You take full responsibility for your health. Humans are individuals and no two are identical. What works for me may not work for you. You may have an allergy, a sensitivity, an underlying condition

[00:32:26] that no one else even shares and you don't even know about. Be careful with your health. By continuing to listen to my podcast or read my blog, you agree to be responsible for yourself, do your own research, make your own choices and not to blame me for anything ever.